Benny and Ray 13

Frannie’s Blues

Ben Fraser was the world’s most perfect man.  Absolutely gorgeous, brilliant, polite, honest, and with a hot bod.  Everybody liked the guy, from little kids to old ladies.  He had quite the following around the neighborhood. What wasn’t to like? The beautiful gray eyes, the gorgeous head of hair, the hot bod…He had a beautiful smile, white teeth, perfect juicy lips… and a hot bod. Yep; Mrs. Anna Francesca Fraser had quite a nice ring to it. 

The night that her brother brought Fraser home that first time, Frannie knew it was a gift from God.  Just the night before, she had gone to church, lit a candle, and prayed for God to send her a man, the perfect man, as soon as he could arrange it.  And voila, Benton Fraser appeared.

Problem was, she was having trouble landing said man.  Had yet to seal the deal.  He was always hanging out with that brother of hers.  Frannie wasn’t getting the chance to bond with him on a new level, which, after all, was the whole frickin’ point of working at the station.  She tried to get close to Frase while he was living with them, but there was always Ray in the way.  And now, Ray was still in her way. Now, anytime he was at the station, Benton was there to see Ray, and so she still could not manage to hook up with him.  Her pain-in-the-ass brother. Ray, Ray, Ray.

They had been spending even more time together. Ray had gotten Fraser into baseball this summer, and the two of them were always at Wrigley.  Ray took Benton to Shedd Aquarium a lot too, and to the planetarium, comedy shows, concerts…she wasn’t getting a chance to spend any time with Benton at all.  Ray had gotten himself and Fraser season passes into Ravinia, and he and Benton had gone to a few concerts already.  Benton loved classical music, which Ray didn’t want to get dragged to, so she had volunteered to go with Benton.  Not that she liked classical either, but for him…she’d worship the devil.  Course, Ray wouldn’t let her go with Benton.  Said he had paid for the passes and so he had a say as to who they went to.  Fraser had ended up going to some Wolfgang Beethoven thing with their cousin Valerie instead.  It was so unfair!

Lately, Ray had taken to spending a couple of nights a week at Fraser’s.  Said he loved the peace and quiet over there.  He almost always stayed over Saturday nights, and on Sundays Fraser would come home with him, and he, Ray, and Ma would all go off to mass together.  Ma couldn’t have been more thrilled.  Now Fraser was some kind of saint for converting a sinner like Ray to a regular church-goer.  Like he wasn’t already a hero in Ma’s eyes for being the good influence that he always had been on Ray, for making him do right.  Benton had become beatified in Ma’s eyes. Yeah, St. Benton. 

The last couple of weeks, Ray had also stayed over on Friday nights, so the rest of the family didn’t see him for two days running.  Frannie thought she could get used to not having him around so much.  They certainly got along better, staying out of each other’s hair.

Frannie had decided to make one more play for Fraser.  Like she told Ray that time in the confessional room-thing at the station, a girl had to dream big.

On her lunch hour, she searched for the right outfit.  Last time, the whole naughty lingerie thing didn’t work, so she had to try a new tactic.

She browsed through the bra and panty selection at Marshall Fields.  She already had two white sets, a black set, and various tan underclothes slung over her shoulder. It was hard to put back the red panties she was naturally drawn to, but she did it for Benton.  She dug through the racks for any simple teddies marked down, and browsed through the hosiery for silk hose and garters.  Somehow, she pictured Fraser as an old-fashioned garter kind of guy.  Like maybe that’d be a turn-on for him. Like, maybe that’d push a button or two. 

She shortly found the most perfect dress. She slipped into a changing room, and tried on the simple, white dress.  Frannie admired it on her size four figure. It was snug but modest at the same time, with a bit of lace at the hem of the skirt and cap sleeves. The hem line came down to her knees. She thought it looked a little like a fancy nurse’s outfit, but that was okay.  She would be Benton’s Florence of Arabia.

See, she had been going at it all wrong, she’d decided.  She shouldn’t have been trying to get Fraser with a sexy, hot little number like some regular guy would get excited by.  She needed something covering, so that Frase could see that she was a good girl, and would make an excellent wife and mother to their many, many children.  She wanted to appear to be the epitome of saintliness.  So what if all she really wanted to do was go down on him anytime, anyplace and suck him like a Hoover? That was her business. Nobody had to know that.

Her friend Mary Jo told her that she should have given up on him a long time ago, like maybe the guy was gay or something, and her friend Rita said she was making a fool out of herself.  But they didn’t know Ben Fraser.  Some things are worth making a fool out of yourself for.

She turned around and smoothed the dress over her ass, wondered if she hadn’t gained a couple of pounds.  It wasn’t easy keeping her figure in that house, the way that Ma cooked.  And the trips to the hair and nail salon on Michigan Avenue were keeping her broke. The job of Civilian Aide paid less than her last job, so she was always scrounging to pull the cash together. But it was worth it. She had to keep herself looking good for Fraser.  

Frannie just worried how she was going to catch Fraser when Ray wasn’t around.  She thought about asking him out for a date, but she knew he’d politely turn her down or simply refuse to answer her at all.  She thought maybe she’d just drop by the apartment some night when Ray’s car wasn’t in the driveway. Maybe bring a bottle of wine…but Fraser didn’t drink…wine.  He did like his milk; that much she noticed from his extended stay at the house.  Fraser alone could go through a couple of gallons a week.  So, she’d come over with a nice chilled jug of milk. Maybe a package of Oreos. Why not?

Frannie stepped out of the white dress and pulled back on her dull blue uniform, regretfully. She got herself together, purposefully walked to the checkout, and pulled out her charge card.

VVVVVV

Two nights later, Frannie saw her big chance.  It was a Wednesday night.  On the way back from Petit’s, she noticed the driveway finally empty of Ray’s car.  Ben’s lights were on, so she knew he was home. When she got home, she quickly put away the groceries, waxed, took a shower,  did her hair, makeup, slipped into her new white panties and white dress, splashed on a little passionflower, grabbed her milk and cookies, and was on her way in no time.

She parked her car in the driveway, and slipped around to the back porch.  A kitchen window was half open, a curtain fluttering in the warm breeze that had just kicked in. There were fewer lights on now, and Frannie wondered if Ben had gone out or had gone to bed. 

Then she heard his voice from a distance. Just an inarticulate sound like a groan or sigh, faintly. She wondered if he was on the phone.  Probably with Ray.  Again.  Ray had gotten Benton a cell phone last month, since Ray needed to know all of a sudden where his Benny was at every waking moment. She heard his voice again, standing there with her hand on the doorknob.  It sounded almost sexual. Frannie felt the cold pricks of dread stab through her entire body.  Could Benton have a lover? Someone he kept secret that not even Ray knew about?

That groan again.  And again. And again. Yeah.  Benton was having sex alright.  Frannie certainly had enough experience in that department to know sexual excitement when she heard it.  Shit.  Shit, Shit, Shit. Impulsively, she twisted the knob and jerked, and – of course, typical Benton—the door opened.

Standing there in the half open doorway, Frannie could hear everything going on in the nearby bedroom.  The bed thumping and squeaking, the sound of flesh slapping together.  Diefenbaker, asleep on the floor in front of the couch, looked up at her with sleepy eyes for a moment and went back to sleep. 

Benton’s voice hit a sudden crescendo.  “Ah, Ray! Ah, Ray! Ah! Ah! Ah!” She could hear her brother’s grunts and groans mixed in with Benton’s cries.

Francesca’s eyes flooded with tears as she quietly pulled the door shut, stifling a sob.  She ran back to her car. 

She was an idiot.  She sat in the car, hands shaking, uselessly squeezing the steering wheel.  How could she have been so stupid?  Ray and Benton Fraser had made a fool out of her. Faking all this buddy-buddy stuff when all along, they had been doing it. God knows how long this thing had been going on.  One of them could have had the decency to tell her.  Hell, she would have understood, even, had some sympathy for their predicament, but now?

To find out this way? They probably got together and laughed about how Ray’s kid sister Frannie threw herself at Benton on almost a daily basis.  Yep.  Probably made all kinds of fun.  She’d never forgive Ray for this. Maybe he didn’t love Benton at all.  Maybe he was just in there…fucking him, just to keep her from getting him. Sounded kind of harsh, but she wouldn’t put it past him. Ray had done some pretty cruel things to her in her life.

And that Benton.  He was no better. He was no saint.  He was a coward. Not telling her was the same was lying, as far as she was concerned.

She started up the car and backed out, nearly backing right into a minivan which swerved, horn blaring.  Frannie could barely see through the tears. She blindly drove around for what felt like hours, glad that it was dark.  She pulled into a parking lot of some playground.  She wasn’t exactly sure where she was.  She didn’t remember how she got there. 

She’d had their kids’ names picked out and everything. The first boy was going to be called Roberto Paolino, and the first girl would be Maria Francesca.  And she liked John, James and Michael, too, if Benton wanted something more waspish for a boy. Or Anna, Stephanie or Jennifer for a girl.  She would let him have the final say-so.  She’d have as many babies as they could support on their modest salaries, teaming up and fighting the bad guys together.  She wouldn’t care if they were poor; as long as they had each other, they’d be happy.  Maybe they could get married in some kind of military ceremony.  Maybe she’d walk under raised swords or something. She’d be happy forever if this dream could come true.

But the dream was never, ever going to come true now. She sobbed and sobbed and sobbed until there was nothing left to cry out. She sat in the quiet, listening to the distant crickets chirping, thinking of all the years of loving Fraser that had gone by, and wondered what now?

 She finally started up the cold engine, and tiredly turned the car towards home.